Mid Exam Thoughts

Just getting this down so that i can remember what this feels like, once it's all over.. :

Its been a lot more relaxed than i thought it'd be, in fact it feels almost exactli the same as trials, except there are more free days between exams. So far, i've had to go to school about twice a week, for 3 - 4 hours at a time.

I have no idea how i'm going in any subject..other than extension 2 maths which i screwed up.

The onli stress comes from regret of not preparing enough (especially for extension 2 maths), manifesting in the shit feeling you get coming out of the asbestos filled hall knowing you've left out more than a quarter of the exam.

Though the onli way to make up for a bad exam is with the exams to come.

Confidence in what you do, which naturalli improves speed is important in maths as i've noticed a little too last minute-ly..i just wish i'd known that before extension 2 =/
Feeling awake is also important..drinking cold orange juice was better for this than warm coffee which put me to sleep..a shower helps too, and 25 pushups gets blood flowing into yur head..
haha, this is more for the benefit of mi sister when its her turn

Been eating two sausage and egg mcmuffin meals a day for breakfast =p

I feel..excitement on exam mornings, like opening a present not knowing whats in the box..calm when the question was within my preparation..panic when its not..brain feels heavier and heavier throughout the exam.
I feel numb afterwards..knowing all thats left to do is wait for the result.

Tilting my head to one side made me dizzy as I was regurgitating my memorised essay, so did forgetting to breathe, but tilting my head back to the other side quickli relieved this.

All nighters are a bad idea.

Though all emotions are switched off, sometimes i still feel a yearning to be outside, especially when i see mobile uploads on facebook of friends having fun..in this case i'd just walk out to dougie's and have a fillets plate with taboulli and chilli, and then take a stroll through westfield, then a lap around the milk and meat fridges at coles to wake me up.

I feel apathy in the day, regret at night for not using the day to the full. I feel pressure from expectation.

Though they say HSC is not the "be all end all", it is appreciably more stressful for people who have a dream, especialli one who's cut-off seems just byond yur abillity.

Spring is must be the "season of love", and the library is full of boys who are there to get their "study" done, the "quiet" room had become something like a party.

Less than one week from now, it will be over, and that feels exciting. Just have to study for physics and chemistry now.

And that is my HSC.