Mid Exam Thoughts

Just getting this down so that i can remember what this feels like, once it's all over.. :

Its been a lot more relaxed than i thought it'd be, in fact it feels almost exactli the same as trials, except there are more free days between exams. So far, i've had to go to school about twice a week, for 3 - 4 hours at a time.

I have no idea how i'm going in any subject..other than extension 2 maths which i screwed up.

The onli stress comes from regret of not preparing enough (especially for extension 2 maths), manifesting in the shit feeling you get coming out of the asbestos filled hall knowing you've left out more than a quarter of the exam.

Though the onli way to make up for a bad exam is with the exams to come.

Confidence in what you do, which naturalli improves speed is important in maths as i've noticed a little too last minute-ly..i just wish i'd known that before extension 2 =/
Feeling awake is also important..drinking cold orange juice was better for this than warm coffee which put me to sleep..a shower helps too, and 25 pushups gets blood flowing into yur head..
haha, this is more for the benefit of mi sister when its her turn

Been eating two sausage and egg mcmuffin meals a day for breakfast =p

I feel..excitement on exam mornings, like opening a present not knowing whats in the box..calm when the question was within my preparation..panic when its not..brain feels heavier and heavier throughout the exam.
I feel numb afterwards..knowing all thats left to do is wait for the result.

Tilting my head to one side made me dizzy as I was regurgitating my memorised essay, so did forgetting to breathe, but tilting my head back to the other side quickli relieved this.

All nighters are a bad idea.

Though all emotions are switched off, sometimes i still feel a yearning to be outside, especially when i see mobile uploads on facebook of friends having fun..in this case i'd just walk out to dougie's and have a fillets plate with taboulli and chilli, and then take a stroll through westfield, then a lap around the milk and meat fridges at coles to wake me up.

I feel apathy in the day, regret at night for not using the day to the full. I feel pressure from expectation.

Though they say HSC is not the "be all end all", it is appreciably more stressful for people who have a dream, especialli one who's cut-off seems just byond yur abillity.

Spring is must be the "season of love", and the library is full of boys who are there to get their "study" done, the "quiet" room had become something like a party.

Less than one week from now, it will be over, and that feels exciting. Just have to study for physics and chemistry now.

And that is my HSC.

So it's finally here.

Good luck guys,

Here..we..go.

One more time.

Its 10 days until my first HSC exam, the exam that seemed so far away for such a long time is suddenly only a little more than a week away. I dont think anybody can ever feel fulli prepared for it, and i say this because i feel the regret of not starting to prepare earlier..

Its realli weird how the hsc has made me feel, and this sounds just a bit cliched but it realli emphasises the pace of life, everything seems to move so fast right now, its like im watching my own life pass by..and theres no second chance. When i reflect over the past week, i've realised that i havent realli done very much study..but oh wells, better late than never right? Haha..>=/

On the other hand though, days seem to pass by so slowly when you think about people whom you havent seen for a while, and all the things that happen that you no longer keep track of, it kinda makes me feel dettached..

I guess all that could be made up for later..hopefulli things dont change too much, which reminds me of what we were talking about at fionna's house on friday, and it was that it would be great if everybody stayed friends even through uni..lol every time i blog, i feel like im just repeating past posts..as;ldkfj

Oh yer, i've been watching 'boys over flowers' for the past two weeks (bad timing i know lol), but despite the bad acting the story is kind of interesting, like a cheap drug..and the songs are gud too, one in particular, though i onli understand one line of it =p
but whenever i listen to this song i feel nostalgic, and the past year plays through mi mind..



One more time.

Duststorm.

Umat results were released today..and they were somewhat disappointing..=/ the first thought that entered my head was how ridiculous it was that this one test was worth as much as yur entire hsc..and that a difference of just two points could mean the difference between getting an interview and not. Oh wells..i guess fairs fair as thats how it is for everybody lol.. but it means that i need an atar of 99 to get an interview..as;dklfj
I talked to K on the phone today to see how he went, and found that he'd lost motivation for med..it felt realli weird to hear it cos we've been chasing this since year 11..but i guess the gud thing about being young is that we have so much opportunity =] ..you've got my support bro, kick some commerce ass!!!

Haha, guess what? after all this time the first thing i blog about is school again..i think i should change the topic before you all fall asleep..

Waking up this morning to find that the sky had turned orange, i thought i was still in a dream..lol until somebody informed me that i wasn't and that it was a dust storm. So, watching it for a while, i thought it was kind of pretty..until i walked outside. There was so much wind that even the birds couldnt fly properly lol, holding my fringe down i cannot help but lol as i could think of at least one other person who disliked the wind for this same reason.

(Duststorms..once in a blue moon..ahahaha i am so funny =D)

It feels kind of..retarded, knowing that school is about to end (haha, couldnt think of any other way to describe it)..the prospect of not being bound by a routine is kind of exciting, but at the same time its a little bit scary because we'll no longer have people to make our decisions for us, and because we'll lose what ties us most strongly to our friends. Taking the 'day off school' *ahem*, we went to the state library to do some work..it turned out to be more fun than i thought it'd be lol, with all the picture taking and everything with B's new camera. R brought us to a $14 japanese buffet where you have an hour to eat as much (pretty and..uh..tasty) food as you can, and after asianly eating our money's worth of prawns, we decided to eat ALL the jelly they had on the dessert table and build a tower with the packaging..quite innovative lol.

but ANYWAYS, hsc is so close ARG!!!! NEED TO STUDY. will blog again soon. i didnt say that. lol.

Sept 6.

So confused.